Bollywood Actress Shama Sikander, who is best known for her role as 'Pooja' in 'Ye Meri Life Hai' battled bipolar disorder and depression for a long time. In a conversation with ABP Live over email, the actress opened up about her struggles and challenges. She also shared how the film industry reacted to her illness and whether they were supportive or not. Shama spoke about all that she went through and the everyday struggles she was facing while battling her mental health issues.
"The most challenging thing was to get up in the morning and face the day and to fall asleep. I just couldn’t sleep for days. I felt such immense grief. I used to cry for hours and the confusion of it all. The darkness that just keeps sucking you. You feel like you’re shouting but no one can hear you. You just keep getting pulled into a dark well. It is the most scariest space you can ever be. I somehow pushed myself into walking every day for some time after not doing anything other than crying and being in bed for a year," she said.
SHAMA SIKANDER ON HOW THE FILM INDUSTRY REACTED:
Shama Sikander said that the film industry was a difficult place back then and people were tough and judgemental. However, she emphasises the fact that things have changed in modern times.
She said, "The industry is a very tough and toxic place to be, unfortunately. It adds to your mental state in a bad way a lot of times. It has very unrealistic expectations which are very hard to achieve sometimes, it's very people-pleasing and judgmental. Although I hadn’t told anyone what I was going through because no one is your friend here, at least no one was at that time. It functioned very differently then. The entire world functioned differently and by the nature of this industry, everyone is too busy here, trying to achieve something for themselves. I mean don’t take me wrong, I understand their struggles today better, I see them and where they come from."
"There are nice people here too and now I see a few of them working on their mental health, hence it’s becoming better. If you are a shallow-minded individual then it’s all fun for you but if you are deep and authentic then it can be very difficult to understand this kind of mindset and cope with the way people behave. Once I shared my story in public, I had a few people call me and ask me or congratulate me for healing and fighting but that's about it. No one came to offer help. A few of them were going through depression and they reached out to me wanting to know how I did it and I helped them wherever I could," she continued to say.
Mental health, though prevailed in older times, did not receive much attention back then and people behaved very differently towards it.
Shama said that there was no dialogue or conversations like how we have today in the entire world and that was how the industry also behaved.
"Our industry is also made of the same people living in the same world, so I can see how this glamour and fame would have come into play but I do see a lot of change in people now. The industry is also changing drastically with time," she said.
"As I said all of us have to put in the work to heal. They were like this because they were also suffering, lost, confused, and traumatised. Suffering only brings more suffering. Only healing will bring love. Only love will heal the world. Conscious practice and discipline to live life healthily will bring a lot of changes in every field," she added.