Bollywood actor Ranbir Kapoor recently found himself in the crosshairs once again. His candid conversation about his marriage with Alia Bhatt on the 'People by WTF' podcast triggered a fresh wave of online outrage, cementing his online reputation as a "red flag." 


What Ranbir Kapoor said


While talking about the challenges of a marriage, the actor said that Alia had to make a lot of changes after they got married. He said, “When you’re in a marriage, you have to let go of your personality. She’s also letting go of her personality. We’re adjusting to each other to make it liveable for each other. Any marriage is doing that. You have to let go, you have to adjust, you have to sacrifice facets of it. It’s impossible for two people to like each other the way they are," Ranbir said.  


Adding further, he said, “She (Alia) used to speak in a very loud tone. I think my father's tone, growing up, always rattled me. So she really made efforts to change that. And that's not easy when you've lived 30 years of your life speaking in a certain way. She's someone who instinctively reacts, like if Raha falls down, there's a reaction that throws me off. She makes certain efforts to put me at ease. I hope I could say there's something I did to put her at ease, but I don't think I've done it yet.” 


Also read: Everything The Actor Said About His Father, Alia, Cheating And More On Recent Podcast


How netizens reacted


As expected, the social media went berserk, and the actor who has already been labelled a “red flag” was criticised for his statement. It all started when Alia, in a video, said that her husband always asks her to wipe off her lipsticks as he likes the natural colour of her lips. Then came an interview where Alia said that her husband doesn’t like her to raise her voice beyond a certain point. After that a barrage of comments, memes and reels started labelling Ranbir a red flag and Ranbir’s latest interview intensified it. 


Why it is unfair to call Ranbir a red flag


Internet's favourite pastime is dissecting celebrity relationships, conveniently ignoring the complexities of human interaction. Either the people labelling Ranbir a red flag have never been in a relationship or live in a “delulu” in Gen Z terms. Relationships, as any sane person knows, are not 50-50 deals. Relationships are complex entities, requiring constant effort, compromise, and understanding from both partners. The notion that one should always contribute equally to a relationship is simplistic over generalisation. In reality, the dynamics often fluctuate, one day you're the rock, and the next you're the moss clinging to it. Yet, the online world insists on reducing these intricate bonds to simplistic, black-and-white narratives. To assume that a person who is seemingly "adjusting" is a victim is to disregard the possibility of mutual consent and happiness.  


If Alia is happy making changes and Ranbir acknowledges and appreciates her efforts, isn’t that a positive sign for their relationship? Celebrities have chosen a public life, that doesn’t equate to an open invitation for microscopic scrutiny of their personal dynamics. We’re all outsiders looking in, with limited knowledge of their relationship. 


Double standards?


It's amusing how quick people are to brand Ranbir a 'red flag' when similar confessions by male actors often go unnoticed. Double standards, anyone? It’s interesting to note that when Vicky Kaushal mentioned that Katrina Kaif has completely revamped his wardrobe and often insists he change his clothes before leaving the house, saying, “there’s no way you are going out wearing this”? Not a single comment labeled Katrina as a 'red flag' or jokingly asked Vicky to signal for help, unlike the reaction to Alia and Ranbir's situation. The difference in response likely stems from the roles being reversed in Vicky and Katrina's scenario. 


Perhaps the internet should take a cue from Michelle Obama who was once praised by the netizens for saying, “Marriage isn’t 50/50, ever. Ever. There are times I’m 70; he’s 30; there are times he’s 60, 40.” 


Maybe it is time for netizens to leave Ranbir Kapoor alone and enter the real world of relationships.