New Delhi: Amit Sadh, who made his Bollywood debut with Sushant Singh Rajput in ‘Kaipoche’, recently opened up about the death of his co-star, having suicidal tendencies in his teenage days, and more.
In a podcast with author Chetan Bhagat, Amit shared that he was shaken up by Sushant’s death he completely “shut” himself and also wanted to quit the industry.
“For me, anyone talks about him, it’s a hit on my head. I spent one and a half year with me. I got so affected, I wanted to quit the industry. When the news came, I closed myself. My show was coming, I called them and said that I don’t want to do any promotions,” he told Chetan Bhagat.
Amit also revealed that he has gone through suicidal thoughts in the past.
“I didn’t tell anyone but I have tried committing suicide four times between the age of 16 and 18 so I know the mindset. Though life has changed now and everything is good. I went inside a dark hole. I know the psyche of a person, when a person takes such a drastic decision, when it’s entirely dark in his/her life. But the person is not at fault, it’s the society’s fault and all those who are around that person,” he added.
He also said that when someone dies by suicide it is society’s fault. “Someone dies by suicide when there is complete darkness in their life. And when there is complete darkness in someone’s life, it is not their fault, it is the society’s fault. Those around them are to be blamed because they did not care enough and someone felt so hopeless, this has happened with me, that one feels that they have nothing.”
Amit also recalled he wanted to reach out to the late actor few months before his death. He said, “3-4 months before he passed away, I spoke to someone who knows him and I said mujhe uska number do, main koshish karunga, main jaake isse baat karta hun. We all were hearing things. And number hi nahi tha, he had shut himself according to that person. That person told me ki voh phone nahi utha raha, number change ho gaya hai but mere andar ek awaaz aayi thi ki kya hoga, gaali bakega, gussa hoga, chale jaate hain. Mujhe jab uss insan ne naa bola, maine bhi chase nahi kia. We all get busy and then voh guilt… voh guil guilt nahi hota , voh ek pyaar hota hai. (3-4 months before he passed away, I spoke to someone who knows him and asked for his number. I said I will talk to him because we were all hearing things. There was no number. That person told me he had shut himself completely and his number was changed. A voice inside me told me that what will happen, he will get upset, I will just drop by his house. When that person told me no, I also did not chase him. We all get busy, then that guilt… I don’t know if it is guilt, it is a kind of love).”
Sushant Singh Rajput was found dead at his apartment in Mumbai in 2020.